You are in a design review and something is bothering you. Not a fact you could point at. A feeling, low down, that this is going to hurt in about six months. Everyone else is nodding. You have nothing you could defend if somebody pushed back, so you say nothing, and the meeting ends.
Three months later it hurts in more or less the way you could not describe.
There is something better to do with that feeling than swallow it, and the instinct to stay quiet until you have a full argument is understandable and expensive.
Start by understanding what the feeling actually is. It is not intuition in any mystical sense. It is pattern recognition running slightly ahead of language. You have seen something shaped like this before, it went badly, and the recall arrived before the reason did. That is real evidence. It is simply evidence in a format you cannot present yet.
Then say it as exactly what it is. This is where people go wrong. They either stay silent, or they inflate the feeling into a claim they cannot support, get challenged on it, and lose the room. There is a third option and it is an honest sentence. I cannot justify this yet, but something about the failure path is bothering me. Give me until tomorrow and I will come back with a concrete objection or drop it entirely.
Hardly anyone refuses that. It costs the room a day, it blocks nobody, and it commits you to doing the work rather than just registering unease.
Then do the work. Go looking for the shape. What happens if this call is slow. What happens if it runs twice. Who owns this in a year. Nine times out of ten, half an hour of poking converts the feeling into one specific question, and one specific question was all you needed.
When it turns out to be nothing, say so plainly and without apologising for having raised it. I looked into it, I was wrong, carry on. That sentence is what buys you the benefit of the doubt the next time.
Experience arrives as a feeling first and an argument second. Do not throw away the first half because the second half is late.
– Asael Shinder
