The first time is reasonable. Budgets were frozen, the reorg landed badly, the committee never met. Your manager tells you it is coming next cycle, you believe them, and you are right to.
The second time is information.
Not necessarily bad information, and not necessarily about you. But something in the system is not moving, and the worst response available is to accept a third vague reassurance and keep working at exactly the same pitch, hoping effort alone will eventually produce the outcome. It usually does not. Effort is what got you into the conversation. Something else decides what happens after it.
So turn the promise into something you can check.
Ask for the criteria in writing, and be specific about what you mean by that. Not a values statement. What does the next level look like in my case, in behaviours you would recognise. What is missing right now. Who else has to agree, and when do those people meet. If none of that can be produced, you have just learned that the promotion is not a decision anybody is currently making.
Ask what happened last time, genuinely and without heat. Where did it stop. That question is more useful than any amount of asking what you should do differently, because it moves the conversation from your performance to the mechanism, and the mechanism is where it stalled.
Then set your own date. Privately, in your own notes, take the next cycle and add a month. Decide now what you will do if it passes, while you are calm rather than disappointed. It does not have to be resigning. It might be asking for a move to a team where the level actually exists. It might be taking scope and money instead of a title. It might be deciding you are happy where you are, which is a real answer when you choose it on purpose rather than drift into it.
Keep your own record of the work in the meantime, in plain words, with numbers in it. Whoever eventually reviews you may not be the person making promises today.
Patience is a strength. Patience without a date is just waiting.
– Asael Shinder
